9 Strategies to Develop the Likeability Factor

There exists a phenomenon that scientists have known for a long time. It is called reciprocity of liking; when we think someone likes us, we tend to like them as well. It is a give and takes relation.

What Likeability Really Means?

It is the key predictor of a successful life in all aspects. Likeability pulls people towards you. From getting invited to the right parties, having a great peer group, scoring that job promotion, likeability plays the key role. So, to maximize your success, you need to develop your attractiveness (overall as a person and not your looks) to increase your likeability quotient.

Many of you might think, there is no reason in particular as to why you like a person. Maybe you like their goofy smile, maybe it is their razor-sharp wit, or maybe they are really easy to be around. So you just like them and the reasons for it could be so many that there can be no limit to the list as to why you really like a person. 

But scientists generally are never satisfied with the answers like that, and they have spent years to try pinpointing out the exact factors that draw one person to another. So, likeability is a skill that can be honed and learned, just like any other skill.

Following are some of their most interesting findings to help you shape better relations, faster.

Use Signaling

If you like someone, you need to show them that you do. Start talking to them. It could be something they were waiting for.

A person is most likely to assume that people get what he/she is trying to accomplish. But it is not true, they do not typically have a clue. Whatever you or whatever you say every day is open to multiple perceptions as of course people are different with different mindsets. 

So when other people try to understand what you actually mean, they are probably to guess it wrong. People tend to think that their social cues are obvious but they are not. Hence, use signalling.

Keep Eye Contact

Keeping eye contact sends a message “you are important and I am listening”. It suggests interest to the individual you are talking to. With your eyes, you can build connection, indicate interest, show emotion and other likeability signals such as warmth, openness, trust etc. 

Smile

Instead of using negative/mean facial expressions like a frown, scowl or grimace. Use the power of your smile to make yourself likeable.

When you smile, you come across as the sweetest, most friendly and approachable. It makes people open up to you. There is a big difference between frowning and smiling. People will be hesitant to approach you if you are frowning but will be naturally drawn to you if you smile. They will feel comfortable.

Call People by Their Name

A person’s name is to him/her the most important and the sweetest sound in any language in this world. 

Why is that?

It is probably because a person’s name is the greatest connection to their own identity. It is one way to easily get someone’s attention. It is a sign of courtesy and a way of remembering and recognizing them.

Stroke Their Ego

You would naturally want to be associated with the people who make you feel accepted as who you are. Everyone has an innate desire to be accepted as it is by their friends, their family and the people they are trying to blend with.

Here are some basic facts about people that is all of us are egoists, all of us are more interested in ourselves than others, all of us want to feel important and want approval from others so that we can approve ourselves.

Letting the other person share a story or two instead of blabbing about yours could give them more positive vibes about your interaction. So flatter people, but not too much. Learn to be sweet as well as true to yourself and to others. Everyone deserves to feel appreciated, needed and good.

Sometimes Listening Actively Is the Key 

This is a crucial part. Active listening involves four steps: hearing, interpreting, evaluating, and responding. Drop what you are doing and pay attention to what the other person is saying. Try jumping to the conclusions with proper evaluation.

Make sure to understand everything before forming and expressing your opinion. Finally, give a feed to the speaker, make them feel heard, make them feel that you are approachable.

Be True to Your Word

Standing with what say and by doing what you say, shows you as a trustable person. It at the same time increases your respect as well as your self-worth too. This will definitely make you more likeable.

Don’t Jump to Conclusions

Do not talk to others with a dismissive attitude or act judgmental towards other people, they will most likely return the same negative feelings towards you.

End a Conversation Right

Your final words leave a long-lasting effect on the listener, so use them right. Try sending people off with a genuine, heartfelt remark like it was great talking with you or I enjoyed getting to know you or I hope you will enjoy the rest of the day. 

It makes the listeners feel good and you are more likely to bond better the next you meet them. 

I hope that it's useful and will certainly help every reader!

Written by- Riya Gupta

Edited by- Harshdeep kaur